I wish I knew:
...that someone kissed your head today.
...that they let you buckle your own car seat even though it takes forever.
...that someone wiped the perpetual snot off your face before you got it with your tongue.
...that you read books today.
...that you got to put away the dishes, or start the washer, or carry laundry to your room, because you love to help so much.
...that someone told you what a great kid you are. At least once.
...that you felt safe in your new home.
...that I Knew instead of Wished...
...that you are OK.
But then on Friday, this happened again:
In a twisted turn, we are WE again. My three musketeers are back. It's not something I wanted to happen for them. I wanted the next stop to be a great one, a solid step in the right direction. Of course, I was happy to welcome them back...to see Sunshine's face absolutely light up when she saw me in the living room...to have Chickadee hanging off my neck again...to be the safe lap that Speed seeks out daily...to know that they are OK, but so sad for them that things didn't work as everyone hoped.
For today, though, I don't have to wonder if someone is giving kisses, providing a lap, wiping snot, or reading stories. This I know.