CPS inspection was last night. This is the one they do every three-ish years where they look in every nook and cranny of your house and interview you about every aspect of your parenting style, routine and fostering agency's policies.
CPS inspector: Do you have any guns?
Me: No.
Him: Any projectiles?
Me: No.
Him: Any weapons?
Me: No.
Him: Any missiles? (Missiles? Seriously, Mister, in my back pocket????)
Me: No.
Big Sister: I don't got missiles either. I got ELBOWS!
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One foster mama's adventures with her various kiddos
From the Mouths of Babes
- "How 'bout we just got to Old McDonald's tonight so you don't have to cook, Mommy?" --Chickadee, October 8, 2015
- "I wanna talk about Jesus Christ." --Speed at the dinner table, Nov. 18, 2014
- "I wonder, when I die, who's gonna tie me up to the cross?" --D, February 17, 2013
- "When the music (in the car) is loud and the birds are flying outside, it looks nice out, doesn't it?" --D, January 27, 2013
- "My kiss was a bird on your cheek." --Little D, November 9, 2012, after a particularly squeaky bedtime kiss
- "You can still be my bestest mommy ever, even when I don't live with you." --Big Sister, March 31, 2012
- "Mom! I was, like, FREAKIN OUT!" --Big Sister, February 24, 2012
- "Why us got two heads, Mama? A forehead and a big head..." --Big Sister, February 20, 2012
- "Aw Man!" --Tiny, who kicked and spilled the catfood, January 15, 2012, second 2 word utterance (1st one = the usual "no mama!")
- "Don't I look BEAUTIMOUS in this?" --Big Sister, January 6, 2012
- "Why us can't see us own heads, Mamma?" --Big Sister, November 23, 2011
- "Mama, I like you. I love you inside my heart." --Big Sis, October 23, 2011
- "I had fun with you today, mama." --GG, August 12, 2011
- "Why someone left their eyebrow hanging there?" --Glamour Girl, pointing to someone's forgotten bra in the Sea World bathroom stall, August 7, 2011
- "Mama? Will you please call me 'mija'?" --Big Sister, July 1, 2011
- "I wiped my pajama." --Glamour Girl, June 2, 2011, not exactly getting the word right....
- "No, Mommy." --Little Sister's first two word utterance, May 14, 2011
- "Brussel sprouts is not my favorite, Mom." --Big Sister, April 19, 2011
- "Baby boobies is kinda like breasts." --Big Sister, March 23, 2011, while watching me dress Little Sister
- "Wow, Mom! Look at all those boobie holders!" --Big Sister, March 5, 2011 while walking through a department store
- "Mama? I love you like a flower!" --Big Sister, March 4, 2011
- "Mira, (Little Guy)! Que bonita Mommy!" --Night Owl, July 21, 2010
- "I'm not naked. I am wearing a sock." --Curly, May 20, 2010
- "You're a really good foster parent, Tammy." --Curly, March 10, 2010, randomly from the backseat of the car
- "I love you, shower. You're good for snappin', you know?" --Curly, March 6, 2010, after figuring out that wet fingers snap louder
- "We have so many presents, we're gonna need another tree!" --Curly, Dec. 24, 2009
- "Mashed tatoes my best friend." --Ladybug, November 15, 2009
- "Pooooor Tammy! You only have ONE KID!" --Bug, when Beignet was at a sleepover, October 18, 2009
- "Does XXX (on that adult video store) mean Kiss, Kiss, Kiss?" --Baby B, driving home from Temple, August 15, 2009
- "I will tell my friends that lava in a volcano is much hotter than soup so that they don't stick their hands in one." --Beignet, July20, 2009
- "Look! Winnie the POOP!!" --Ladybug, June 24, 2009
- "Yumolicious!" --Ladybug, May 16, 2009
- "You know we have room for another sister back here in the middle, don't you?" --Baby B from the backseat of the car, April 19, 2009
- "Must've been the hokey pokey." in response to my query of "What was THAT all about?"--Baby Beignet, March 26, 2009
- "I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to my undies."--Baby Beignet, February 14, 2009
- "God is Grace, God is good." --Baby Beignet, January 30, 2009
- "I so happy, I purr like a cat!" --Little Bit, November 11, 2008
- "AHHHH! This is the life!" --Little Bit in the bathtub, November 1, 2008
- "I don't DO mixed vegetables because the corn tastes like carrots and the carrots taste like peas and the peas taste like lima beans." --Sass, October 2008
- "How could I live here SO long and you've never fed me CELERY??" --Miss Sassafras 9/2/2008
- "How come when Jesus was nailed to the cross, He died, but I didn't die when I stepped on a nail?" --Miss Sassafras, August 2008
- "Have you ever seen the show Extreme Homemakeover? I think you need to write in." --Miss Sassafras, 7/26/2008
- "I like C.C. now. I kiss him on the lips." --the shorter gentleman, July 2008
The Zoo
- December 9, 2016-....: Junebug
- July 2, 2015-March 18, 2016-Eagle
- June 20, 2014-January 16, 2015 : Junebug
- May 9, 2013-August 7, 2013 and again on August 23, 2013-FOREVER:: Speed, Sunshine, and Chickadee
- September 7, 2012-March 29, 2013: Little D and Peanut
- September 5, 2012-February 15, 2013: Buddy
- April 1, 2011-March 30, 2012: Glamour Girl and Tiny Man
- December 10, 2010-March 3, 2012: Big Sister and Little Sister
- June 29-November 5, 2010: Night Owl and Itty Bitty
- May 15-November 3, 2010: Little Guy
- January 22, 2010-February 18, 2010: The Little Howler Monkey
- December 11, 2009-May 28, 2010: Curly and Sister
- March 30, 2009-November 25, 2009...Little Ladybug
- January 30, 2009-December 17, 2009...Baby Beignet
- October 10, 2008-November 25, 2008: Little Bit
- July 25, 2008-November 22, 2008: Miss Sassafras
- July 17, 2008-July 25, 2008: The Gentlemen
- June 25, 2008-July 9, 2008: The Town Crier
- May 15, 2008-June 10, 2008: The Princess
- May 15, 2008-June 23, 2008: The 3rd brother
- Dec 13, 2007-March 21, 2008: Two Blond Brothers
- November 1-5, 2007: Shorty but Cutie
1 comment:
Crap, are they not allowing elbows now? We've got six of them in this house!
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