I don't MEAN to make this awkward

Conversation last week at adoption ceremony for a friend with a couple whom have adopted a baby after fostering one previous child:

Dad: How many kids have you had?
Me: 28.
Him: Oh yeah, we know exactly how you feel. We had one before (daughter) that we had to give back.
Wife: Dear, she said 28 kids. You said ONE.
Him: Oh.

And then he avoided talking about his kid, fostering or the obvious adoption that was about to happen the rest of the time.

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Conversation at school today while waiting for an ARD meeting to start:

Special ed teacher to me: Did you see (African American student)'s mom out there?
Me: I don't think so. Is she African American?
Classroom teacher, sarcastically: No, she's white.
Me: Well, MY kids are african american....
Him: Oh. Sorry.

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Conversation at a birthday party with Chickadee:

Someone I've never met before: What's your daughter's name?
Me: Chickadee.
Her: REALLY? That's...um...unusual. What's her middle name?

And then I started laughing. I cannot say the middle name to a stranger who doesn't know I didn't choose these names without laughing apparently.

(I am reminded of the month I spent trying to wrongly pronounce Little Guy's name. Chickadee's middle name is easy to pronounce. It's just a little "thematic" and makes me giggle. Let's not even discuss Sunshine's...)

Conversation with a Five-Year-Old Client

(but I have no idea where it began)

Me: I don't like that (doing something at home...can't remember what).
Him: Well, what about your husband?
Me: I don't have a husband.
Him: Wait, WAH?
Him: Well, where do you get all your babies from?

At this point, his mother is bright red. BRIGHT red.

Me: People bring them to my house.
Him: (open mouth stare)
Him: How does THAT work?
Me: I have a special family. When a kid needs a safe place to live, someone brings them to houses like mine and they stay there so they can be safe.
Him: Oooooooohhhhhhh! Now I see!
Me (not out loud): Yeah, I bet....

Coincidentally, we went to a nearby church's "biblical village" tonight and ran into this kid. He was able to meet "all my babies." :)

That's My Girl!

Text from sitter last night:

"Sunshine just told me she's crabby. I had to try very hard not to laugh."

Progress

The kids thought it was the CRAZIEST thing that I served sandwiches for dinner last night.

Sunshine said: "It not lunch! It dinner! We not eat sandwiches."

We've come a long way, Baby.

Ain't That the Truth

From a woman on the playground after watching Chickadee play for about 30 seconds:

"Now THAT is a giant personality packed into a teeny little body, isn't it?"

Yup.

#days in foster care

There's seemingly a new trend around. As best I can figure, it started with this article and photo shoot about how many days a girl spent in foster care before she was adopted. Now many people are posting and blogging about how many days their kids have been in care and how ridiculously high that number is.

But guess what?

I think in many ways foster care is a GOOD THING. My kids are 303 days in care minus the 15 days they were moved away from me for their "vacation" which didn't work out.

That's 288 days that they have not been hurt.
That's 288 days that someone has not failed to protect them.
That's 288 days that they've been able to heal.

I get the point of the article. Kids should not be lingering in limbo with permanency a carrot dangling in front of them for days, months, years. More importantly, we all wish there was not a need for foster care to begin with--that every child in the world could hold up a sign reading "0 days in foster care."

Unfortunately, there will always be a need for foster care. But it's not all bad. In fact, much of it is good.

288 days of lovin' and more to come.

Question Du Jour

Upon hearing that we are a foster family:

"How did you know your heart would be big enough to foster?"

"I didn't."